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Posts Tagged ‘Ruby Cantu’

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Life has a way of stopping me from doing more than I should be doing. Take yesterday for instance…tried weed eating, battery wasn’t fully charged, didn’t do much….tried mowing, ran over the cord, killed it…love that I can push a button and easily start my mower…just haven’t mastered the whole dragging of the cord…yard looks tarded….this morning my body just quit…it just said “silly bitch…you’re done” just like that…I retreated with my tail between my legs.

I was going to reach out to an estranged family member…caught myself…said to myself…not your turn.

Did a bit better in the laundry department…got my stuff unpacked from my little getaway, now it’ll be a week or two before I get to what I just washed. I don’t know why I can’t just get it all done right then and there.

Cooked a pot of beans, bought groceries, had carbs in mind….I got a lot of carbs. Weighed myself…I gained 5 pounds…sheesh, that shoulda gone the other way.

I had set aside some non perishable food items for Saturday’s roundup, the USPS did not pick up the food I had bagged, found someone who could use it and delivered the goods.

Spent the afternoon with my beautiful baby girl…we took out trash and she “helped” clean.

And that’s about all the unexciting blah schtuff going on around here…Only stopped by to do this while I wait for something to load on another page, I miss writing just can’t find the inspiration so once again I will lie to myself and tell myself I’m going to keep trying….

TTFN

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Shuttles, monorails, escalators, and elevators…modern marvels from engineering greats that made Vegas a lot easier to maneuver through….now it would’ve been great if the whole city had moving sidewalks….but anywho….all of the above made it easier and made it possible for me to see as much as I could. I’m still recovering from all the walking I did, I anticipated the pain….doesn’t make it any easier but mental preparation helps.

 

I’ve had friends and family asking for trip pics…I don’t want to be that annoying person that posts a gazillion pictures on Facebook, so I’m posting them on my blog, that way people can decide if they want to suffer through all those pics…that’s if I’m able to post them all here…well not all…that’s too many…

I got to see my cousin Juancho at the MGM, Roger and the girls (I think Roger’s girl wanted to kill me), my bff Michael and Maria and Jose who were there to celebrate 25 years of wedded bliss….also a nice variety of strippers and hoes….I did put my hands on some rock hard man candy…sorry ladies no pics of that….

 

 

So here goes….just random shots from the strip…

 

 

 

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I can’t say I can see the light at the end of the tunnel…so I’m going with shimmer….while I am going thru something I yet refuse to fully acknowledge or deal with…I know I can feel a shift…but while my head is still stuck in the sand I can focus on me…

For over 30 years my main role has been mother, I’m trying to put some of those day to day worries aside and take care of me…or at least pamper myself…or pay someone else to do it…with a background in the beauty industry it has been one of those things I just did for myself…this past weekend I went and got my hair cut and nails done…it was hard to not tell the stylist how to cut my hair…I know my hair…and I’ve paid anywhere from $10 to $100+ for a hair cut…normally I cut my own hair…every so often I need a little help getting the back cut…you’d think a simple cut straight across would be idiot proof…but I find myself having to educate the stylist about my hair type….nothing screams to me “walk away” when I see a stylist grab a water bottle…I chose to educate the stylist as gently as possible…she did a great job…but I had the poor thing shaking…that wasn’t my intention…but I’ve walked out of 3 salons in one day for the same thing…and then while spending mother/daughter time we decided to get our nails done….***sigh…I regret giving away my supplies…I used to also do my own nails…I am not happy with the nails….too thick, too square, too big…so last night I reshaped them…they are still too thick….I know if I mess with them any more I’ll end up ripping them off…and that’ll hurt…and fuck up my nails more than they already will be just for having artificial nails on…so yeah…maybe I am a tad too much of a picky pain in the ass….

I think I’ll stick to do it yourself…I mean myself….logo

Then the guilt sets in…for frivolously spending on myself…cause yeah….there’s other things I should be thinking about….but nope….not yet…not ready…

 

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Today was the start of a new chapter….and boy what an eye opening chapter it is….did I bite more than I can chew…can I do this? So many questions now…but at the time when they were asking…”Do you have any questions? ” My mind was a blank….sometimes the more things change, the more they stay the same…I was going to go into this new thing with some excitement, some hope that I would be making a difference…now…not so sure…and just like I advised my number 3 to readjust his mindset…well I have to take my own advise and readjust mine…the idealism must go and it must be replaced with realistic expectations…and my feeling towards expectations has always been to keep my expectations low…or just not have any…that will help in not being disappointed….

The good thing about all this is that the other door to the other part of what I was doing is still open……and will be open for at least two weeks….I may need it to remain open…I hope not…I know how to put my big girl panties on and deal…I’ve been doing this like forever….on another note…I know there are quite a few job openings in Starr County….them thieving rat bastards made sure of that….what the fuck is wrong with people? But I do have to admire their genius on one level…they sure had quite a scheme going….just goes to show not all mesicans are stoopid….but eventually shit will catch up with ya….idiots….

I gots a headache…I’m thinking lack of food….

Word is my baby…the tator…is finally being released from the hostage situation he has been embroiled in….and he will be on his way to “A” school tomorrow…yay…

….and off I go to hunt up some entertainment…book or a movie….

step

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Muscle relaxer and pain pill down the hatch….note to self….next time the stupid idea to do yard work strikes….strike back…or strike a match. I used to be able to do all the yard work required to maintain a decent looking property…today…not so much. And I enjoy doing it….my back is hating me for it….big time. I can’t even start a lawn mower on my own….that sucks balls. #3 had to start it for me a couple of times. The third time I just gave up and let him finish up. I hate, hate, hate not being able to do these basic things….things I could do BEFORE. I miss so much of that….it is a reminder that I no longer have the ability to be self sufficient. I’m so not good with that. The added pain makes it that much more painful to pick up my precious bundle of joy….soon I will have to make changes there. Not sure how that will work out. Today all I could do was put her down in the crib and play with her from there…..SIGH….life can suck….but my beautiful babies make it a bit better…and having this beautiful princess in my life sure makes a lot of other shit bearable….well enough for now…I’m slowly working my way back to writing. I’ve missed it and have to get back into it…it is indeed therapeutic.

 

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What? Yeah…..some trends that have been growing exponentially….on Facebook most days I feel like I don’t know the place anymore….I used to enjoy my drop-ins and contributions to make someone smile or think….nowI feel like I accidentally stumbled back in time and I’m in church….the Church of Facebook….where there are all sorts of condemnations…..or back when I’d drop in at the town’s local pancake and coffee shop and the old timers would get into heated discussions over politics….***SIGH**** I do miss the old Facebook….I know some of the going ons are trends, the pet posting, the trout pout pics, etc, etc….anywho I’ll stop bitching about that….

Day off from job 1, so much to do and waiting on motivation, savoring my coffee…still doing laundry, have ironing to do, clothes to put away,a vacuum to run, a list of things I want to put together and photograph and hopefully sell, if not off to freecycle. I also have to try to finish my haircut….I can get one side just right or close enough to where it does what I want to, but I get challenged with the other side, I’ll eventually get it to where I’m okay with it or where I give up and let it grow out again.

My cup is almost dry…so I’ll be wrapping things up, shower, haircut, ironing station setup, may watch a movie while I do that….then I’m hoping for a nap before I go to job 2…..I want to enter a drawing for maid service for a year….and win….where do I sign up????

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