Pretense II~

Much of life is pretense, no not your life, but mine, and no not always.

I sit there with a well honed practiced smile masking the shooting pain radiating up and down my spine. I answer question after question while inner turmoil swirls throughout my mind. I’m worried that the thin veil of perspiration forming over my top lip and the pulsating redness washing over me will give away my secret.

Just when I think it is almost over I’m faced with a second round of questioning. I’m so out of practice and my fear is that my armor will once again crack. The pain is unbearable and I think passing out could soon look like an enticing option.

How did I get here? A karmic universal gesture from the gods I didn’t piss off. Surely someone else’s genetic stamp is all over this.

Once again my focus is channeled to the inquisition, my smile still pasted on. I am a major league class A faker. The Great Pretender. I don’t know how I did and quite frankly part of me doesn’t give a care. I should care but I am not rational at this point.

Book Ponderings part deux~

I’ve reached the conclusion of The Chimney Sweeper’s Boy and thoroughly enjoyed the story, it isn’t for everybody so I won’t recommend it. But if I ever come across another book by this author I will read it. Oh yeah the author is Barbara Vine also known as Ruth Rendell. There are some metaphor’s throughout and deciphering those goes a long way in solving the mystery of the fictional author….anywho…here are some additional quotes~

When you think someone is listening to you he is probably only considering what to say next.

It is very hard to come to terms with the fact of someone simply not liking you.

The greatest fallacy is that good looks are an essential ingredient of sexual attraction.

There’s no knowing why we remember some things and forget others.

Those who marry to escape something usually find themselves in something worse.

Book ponderings~

Faith is believing in what you know to be false….

Very little is more irritating than the speech patterns of someone we know to be intelligent yet who is ignorant of grammar and correct usage.

He admired her strength until it overshadowed his. Then he sought to diminish her. She acquiesced well past the time she knew she should have stopped, sadly she was hoping he would have admired her resolve and her independence, he wasn’t man enough for her.

They all tried to change her, from muzzling her when she spoke her mind, to putting her down for daring to show she had a mind of her own.

She awoke one day to realize she hadn’t met a man yet who would have the balls to be a man. The balls he carried were nothing more than a scratching post or a couple of play things useful for warming up a cold hand.

Don’t be a Republican. They are self-dealing crooks with no sense of honor or patriotism to their fellow citizens. If you must be a Republican, don’t be a “conservative.”  They are whining, bitching, complaining, simple-minded self-righteous idiots who think they’re perpetual victims.

Go out and live life. Make real friends that are there for you and will have your back.

Don’t gay bash. Don’t mentally or physically abuse people because of who they are, or how they present themselves. It’s none of your business to try to intimidate people into conformity.

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