Phase 1 and other ramblings

So it took some walking on the ledge for months but I finally got the ball rolling on a few things…I suffer from severe embarrassingly debilitating anxiety over the dumbest things…but I have learned (or am still learning) to deal with these issues. I don’t have anyone to hold my hand (yes, I have friends who offer, but that’s not helpful to me, sorry, not sorry). it takes me a while but I get things done…all the while creating other issues that will eventually need attention….what a vicious cycle I make myself go through…lol. But I am getting the needed repairs to my house, the morning rain may put a pause on the remaining work, we shall see…once this is complete I can move forward on other projects….

Now on to the other shtuff…

I have posted a few things on social media and received PM’s about the meme’s I have posted and I don’t mean any of them to one individual person, sheesh…but some have taken them personally and are affronted…I hate having to soothe ruffled feathers and reassure someone that no, it’s not you…to the point where I end up blowing up and just saying yes, you win, it is about you…so aggravating…..yet again very telling as to what they may be up tp and where they see themselves wearing the shoes…hey if they fit, put them on, wear them, run in them…far away…please…I don’t always have the patience to sugarcoat shit where it is not needed…rant over…I think….at least for now.

Other ramblings…I enjoyed a nice quiet weekend, it was a hit and miss with one of my favorite peeps, but we will make it happen soon…I also went to Dillard’s and did a little shopping, I have been carrying a gift card for 2+ years and I still haven’t managed to spend all the money on it….and I thought yesterday was going to be the day, but my math skills really suck…lol…so until the next 40% off clearance sale…I did score 3 items, a pair of Levi’s and 2 shirts….then back to la Casa.

Overall a nice chill weekend.

Cryptic much…not….

“Purple popcorn. Sun. Fork.” Do you understand what that means? Of course not! It’s totally cryptic…seems like perhaps my last post fit that category…4 individuals questioned my last blog…they each thought it was about them…hmmm…guilty conscious much…

The individual in question was a friend that I have been playing phone tag for a while with…we finally coincided with a plan to get together…only to have that cancelled (again)…no biggie, I’ve done that a time or two or ten…life happens, things come up…I don’t get bent over it…but the pisser here was the lame and tacky way it was handled.

Simplicity works much better…”something came up…raincheck” would’ve been a lot better than how it played…details not important…but I know when to call it good and move on.

One of the biggest annoyances is a waste of makeup and wardrobe…I could’ve made a spontaneous outing with someone else…but it didn’t feel right…and I had to unruffle my feathers…


Whoever said hair doesn’t grow on nipples didn’t see “those” nipples….

Stupid is as stupid does, and I have been on a roll. I suffered a bit with hyperactivity a couple of days ago….couldn’t keep myself to any single task…consequently I hand washed my car, I worked on scraping paint off the coffee table, I baked lemon bars, I did laundry, I swept, I vacuumed (not that it looks like I did) then I piddled around starting other things that I just didn’t get to completing….and what did I get for all this….yeah this is where the stupid part comes in…PAIN….lots of fucking back pain…I almost didn’t want to stop everything I was doing, once I stop I start to intensely feel the aftereffects of all my moving around, bending, stooping, stretching, pulling and pushing…**SIGH*** when will LIFE (without pain) go back to “normal” (whatever the fuck normal is…)

Had another session of dramatics…not a fan of that….I’d much rather pull my eyelashes out one by one…or shave my toes…but all is well now…gotta go wake the kidlets up…

They just keep on growing………


Well the damn weeds will not pull themselves the fuck out. So I am on my knees, I’m stooped over and I’m killing my already killed back doing what nobody else seems to think they need to do. Yeah sure having a landscaper would be great, but I’m the damn landscaper, not that I’m scaping the land, but I sure as hell am trying to keep it from becoming overgrown with weeds. I’m also stripping paint off of a coffee table so I can repaint it, I don’t yet know what color I’ll be doing it, maybe something bright and unexpected or maybe boring black.


Looks like the tit for tat bullshit nonsense is trying to rear its ugly head…tried nipping it in the bud but it may have backfired. Maybe I should study conflict resolution a little more. My idea of resolution is to say “fuck you” and walk away….though I now tend to just say it inside my head…not very effective…but part of it is the whole trying to be mature about things. Skulking isn’t so much my thing but I am reactive to it….anyway enough about that nonsense…I have more randomness…

I have been flirted with and hit on….it was kinda sorta fun (not the hit on part, there is something smarmy about that) the flirting I can handle….but full out hitting on is just not cool….but it is amusing to hear the lines being used….I so wanna ask if their delivered BS ever works but sadly the answer is probably a yes…but not for me.

People are NASTY and stupid…well perhaps not so stupid after all they did get what they wanted….

I’m gaining my weight back in a fun way….eating lots….but I didn’t get to my ice cream yet….I’m scheduling that for my next day off…juggling 2 jobs I have to get  strategic about the eating of certain things that have adverse effects on me…ice cream makes my belly bloat….and makes me feel miserable….usually afterwards, thankfully not while eating….

Well I’m off to read myself to sleep, have a long 2 days coming up….

Book ponderings~

Faith is believing in what you know to be false….

Very little is more irritating than the speech patterns of someone we know to be intelligent yet who is ignorant of grammar and correct usage.

He admired her strength until it overshadowed his. Then he sought to diminish her. She acquiesced well past the time she knew she should have stopped, sadly she was hoping he would have admired her resolve and her independence, he wasn’t man enough for her.

They all tried to change her, from muzzling her when she spoke her mind, to putting her down for daring to show she had a mind of her own.

She awoke one day to realize she hadn’t met a man yet who would have the balls to be a man. The balls he carried were nothing more than a scratching post or a couple of play things useful for warming up a cold hand.

Don’t be a Republican. They are self-dealing crooks with no sense of honor or patriotism to their fellow citizens. If you must be a Republican, don’t be a “conservative.”  They are whining, bitching, complaining, simple-minded self-righteous idiots who think they’re perpetual victims.

Go out and live life. Make real friends that are there for you and will have your back.

Don’t gay bash. Don’t mentally or physically abuse people because of who they are, or how they present themselves. It’s none of your business to try to intimidate people into conformity.

Stupidity knows no bounds

Last night while skyping with my friend Tracy, she alerted me to a comment on her blog about me. In essence this moron had the ability to cure me of my scoliosis, and better yet, he could do it over the phone. Like I’m really just going to pick up the phone and call a kid out who knows where and believe he has the cure. Where do this people come from? What makes them tick that way? How do they come to believe that they can blow on someone’s feet and make a leg grow a couple of inches? What are they smoking? I want some funny stuff to smoke too…but that could be dangerous…can you imagine the stupidity that would come out of my mouth if I smoked anything funny, as it is I can spew stupidity without any help. You can go here and read all about it…. click here>>>> Living with scoliosis

***No disrespect intended***

You just can’t make this shit up.

Oh no…please don’t disconnect me…

So I have for the most part been ignoring my phone, but then I got to listening to my messages…which was a good thing as I got a call from my internet/cable/phone provider and they had someone else trying to “move into my place” and get services established…whew…I called them and got all that squared away….I wouldn’t want to deal with that hassle…so I had to explain to a few people that it was not at my house, it was my apartment…sheesh…there are many idiots out there working….scary.

I am almost done reading my book, I have a few more lined up to read…some days I just can’t get past 2 or 3 pages…other times I can breeze through a couple of hundred pages….I guess it really does depend on the author, the subject matter and my mood.

Speaking of which…I’m about to head to bed, plop myself up on my pillows and read the rest of the book…maybe tonite I will get it done….

There are people out there who want to be like me~

Okay, that’s probably not true. I really have no evidence to back that up… but I’ll tell you this, I’ve heard it before, a time or two or ten. Better yet, there are people out there who should want to be like me….at least, more like me, because the people they’re being like now are… well, not very good people. Maybe they’ve decided to be like the idiots that are in charge of them, you know like their spouses or insignificant others and such….clearly, it’s just an issue with their choice of role model, and a better selection would naturally lead to a better life. And what better role model than moi to lead you into an existence of perfection?

So I’m here to offer myself as a shining example of how to at least be better than those dim bulbs. It ain’t much, but you gotta go with what you know, or what you think you know, and I think that’s what I know, at least in this very moment I think I know this.

So, as a public service for those idiots with no soul, or souls that were sucked out by the evil gnomes, you know those little people that have a complex because they are little and they try to wear big panties…..

 I’d like to present my list of “Rules to Live By”. These should help you make it through those dark times when you’re not sure which way to turn, or whether you should squeeze into those spandex leggings that should not be made in an extra large size giving you the idea that they were meant for you to wear. You could also walk away knowing what an unused condom would taste like. And for those of you who already know you shouldn’t squeeze your behind into anything that is willing to stretch that much or know what an unused condom taste like, well more power to you…and this would also mean you shouldn’t need my help.

Feel free to peruse the list, and take what you can use, of course. Given the slim chance that you’re already set up with a role model better than me….then please, for the love of sweaty porcupine humping, don’t trade down to me. You’ll be drooling and sitting around picking your nose all day….in no time, and you’ll just get bored. I feel qualified to help the few  who are regular viewers of the Real Housewives, Cops or Cheaters….but I don’t have much for the rest of you Oprah show watchers, I’m afraid….you’re already ahead of this particular curve.

But for you half-evolved humans…(if you even qualify as human) who need my help, here are some of my Golden Rules to Live by.

Learn them, live them, and practice them well, and you too could be just like me.

(Aching back and graying hair not included. Limit one personality overhaul per customer. Offer not valid in Kansas.)

Rule 1: If it’s not food, and you’re not currently participating in shenanigans, then don’t eat it. And don’t lick it, either, unless you’re double dog dared.
Rule 2: When cornered in the company of fools, play dead. They’ll eventually get distracted and wander off.
Rule 3: Never answer ‘Yes’ to a question you didn’t fully hear or understand. No matter how annoying ‘Huh?’ can get, it’s infinitely better than accidentally agreeing to wash someone’s car, or loan them a thousand dollars…
Rule 4: No one….anywhere, ever, under any circumstances….wants to see your genitalia….yours no, anyone else’s….well….that is different…..
Rule 5: Be courteous and kind to any person who hasn’t pissed you off yet. As for the others, fuck with their minds. Mercilessly…..a well intentioned Mindfuck beats a good round of Sudoku.
Rule 6: You can do whatever the hell you want in the shower, as long as you don’t tell anyone.

And that’s it. Really, those are the only criteria I use as I wander through life. So now you know. I can only hope that you’ll take these lessons to heart, and that we’ll have a little more sanity in the world going forward.

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