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Posts Tagged ‘Easter’

When I was younger, much younger, back when I didn’t have a care in the world I would frolic.  You could find me frolicking in the tall green grass on any given sunny morning, there would not be anyone to keep a watchful eye on me as I would chew on a piece of dead rabbit that had more than likely lost its life the previous day. The meat would be a mix of chewy and tender, blood would drip from the corners of my mouth as I bit through the fluffy rabbit pelt…..one quick bite into just the right spot on a leg would guarantee a lucky rabbit’s foot that could be dried out and used as a lucky charm, driving a nail through it and making a hole where a piece of wire could be strung through it and arts and crafts time would yield 4 key chains, dipped in grape Kool-Aid and the perfect purple was a blow dry away….ahh….the good old care free days of my youth….how I miss them…..Easter is right around the corner, that time of year where people buy little bunnies and baby chicks and paint them pretty pastel colors and give them to their kids as an Easter treat…then the next day they are posted online as freebies…WTF?

I’ll just ask you this: have you ever realized, after shaving, that you’ve accidentally left one or two hairs in a particularly annoying place, and that said hairs are going to bug the shit out of you all damned day? Of course this happens mostly in the summer when wearing shorts and you cross your leg over your knee and you look at your ankle and right there you’ll see a small smattering of missed hairs….WTF? Then you know you won’t be comfortable crossing your legs and you’ll be all paranoid knowing someone else will notice and then they will point and then laugh….then you further realize that there’s nothing you can do about it, because you’ve already left the house, and you may not be able to score a razor and sneak off for a quick hair-grazing. Why must we have to go through this deforestation…I’m all for alopecia of the legs and pits….and arms…I’ve got the beastliest arms….yeah I know if you hadn’t noticed before, I’m sure you’ll be looking next time you see me…..bringing this train wreck to an end I will let you know that I will attack the left over strays….sometime…..or maybe not, seasonally it’s the right time to allow the forest to splendor….I’m just saying…

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