Phase 1 and other ramblings

So it took some walking on the ledge for months but I finally got the ball rolling on a few things…I suffer from severe embarrassingly debilitating anxiety over the dumbest things…but I have learned (or am still learning) to deal with these issues. I don’t have anyone to hold my hand (yes, I have friends who offer, but that’s not helpful to me, sorry, not sorry). it takes me a while but I get things done…all the while creating other issues that will eventually need attention….what a vicious cycle I make myself go through…lol. But I am getting the needed repairs to my house, the morning rain may put a pause on the remaining work, we shall see…once this is complete I can move forward on other projects….

Now on to the other shtuff…

I have posted a few things on social media and received PM’s about the meme’s I have posted and I don’t mean any of them to one individual person, sheesh…but some have taken them personally and are affronted…I hate having to soothe ruffled feathers and reassure someone that no, it’s not you…to the point where I end up blowing up and just saying yes, you win, it is about you…so aggravating…..yet again very telling as to what they may be up tp and where they see themselves wearing the shoes…hey if they fit, put them on, wear them, run in them…far away…please…I don’t always have the patience to sugarcoat shit where it is not needed…rant over…I think….at least for now.

Other ramblings…I enjoyed a nice quiet weekend, it was a hit and miss with one of my favorite peeps, but we will make it happen soon…I also went to Dillard’s and did a little shopping, I have been carrying a gift card for 2+ years and I still haven’t managed to spend all the money on it….and I thought yesterday was going to be the day, but my math skills really suck…lol…so until the next 40% off clearance sale…I did score 3 items, a pair of Levi’s and 2 shirts….then back to la Casa.

Overall a nice chill weekend.

Losing my skills….


Technology is awesome, but also it is robbing me of my typing and spelling skills. Those wonderful features that auto correct and complete your words…well they are making me too lazy. I seriously doubt I could even do 25 words a minute anymore….that is so not good…so I need to step it up and practice more “writing”…I need to make a bigger effort to brush up on my skills. So I will try to get back to blogging or journaling. I am disgusted with my complacency…yet I love the technology that allows me to shoot a text faster than if I tried to clumsily type on a tiny little keyboard. I also hate texting, and using the phone…and my phone has been ringing like crazy, I don’t want to know who is calling cause I don’t want to be on the phone. I know I can be very unsocial I just consider it my being verbally economic….and for the most part I don’t have anything interesting to add…my life has become more vanilla than it used to be. My routine rarely changes…at times I hate it but for the most part I’m just getting set…in my old ways.

How do you feel when…

…you are on the phone with someone and you notice a pattern of hearing them yawn EVERY time you talk to them? Do you chalk it up┬áto habit (on their end)? or do you pin it on yourself? (as in you’re a bore….) just a wondering….sheesh…why am I not asleep?


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