Not liking this shit~

How could I possibly feel like I am near death? From doing what? Nothing, not a god damn thing…pisses the fuck out of me…yes, I’m bitching, ranting, raving….ughhhh

Okay, let’s be fair, went out to lunch…but fuck my ass…well…no don’t fuck my ass…how could that wear the shit out of me….it’s not like I went to a different country, or state or city…just here in town, a few miles down the road…and I get home and want to die, yeah really, the boys thankfully have a fucked up summer schedule so they are sleeping randomly, I got home, it was quiet so I said fuck it, and went to bed too. Have not cooked for them today, I don’t know what they’ve had to eat, I’m not terribly worried either, I’m sure they’ve managed….but deep down there is a pang of guilt.

I slept, got up and watched Funny People with Adam Sandler…man that was a long ass movie…enjoyed it…but still with potty breaks it was even longer…lol.

gotta love Adam Sandler

Got cookies baking. need cookies


18 thoughts on “Not liking this shit~

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  1. Look, i found a Ruby in a mountain of rocks today. and it shined like the moon and the stars on a dark night. Wounds take time to heal. It seems like it will never end, but death is not an option. the guilt is part of being a loving parent. if you could, i know you would do whatever it takes for your boys.

  2. Hey Ruby, life can suck the big one, I know that from 58 years of experience, and having said that, we have our moments of weakness and despair and we need to rant and rave at the universe if only to allow all that negative energy out. Self pity is often underated. πŸ™‚

  3. Thanks Linda…I needed to get that out…I try not to bottle my feelings, doesn’t get me anywhere, this is my safe little corner to bitch, moan and whine. I agree about the self pity;)

  4. Let off the steam, baby! That’s the only way to go! No shame in letting it rip, better than your head exploding.

    What kind of cookies? πŸ˜‰

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