Rocky Relapse

~~~and it sucks ass

I felt on top of the world….for a while, but setbacks are a bitch. I finally was transferred from ICU to IMC (Intermediate Care) there is good and bad, ICU is too intrusive, IMC not enough. In IMC I have to anticipate trips to the pot way ahead of time….the quality of care has gone down since June (my last time here).

I am now battling congestion, my lungs are weak….makes my entire body hurt when I start having coughing fits.

Now it is a bit after 1 am and I am wide awake….I may double on my pain meds, and the screamer across the hall is also awake…I am ready to go home. My body is not mine, I have hit a wall, head on, with my glasses on, so now I have bits of glass messing with my “vision”. I am struggling with trying to adapt to the changes made to my body, it is not my body. I don’t recognize it….and I don’t want it….wanna trade?

Happy Humpday

I managed to get some sleep last night, despite having to get up 3 times to use the facilities, it is getting easier to get back in bed, it is the getting out I’m still struggling with. I still have an IV line, BP cuff, heart monitor, breathing monitor and I can’t think of the something else monitor but I have that one too…oh and the electronic compression boots.

I need to be with my babies.....

 I am quicker than the staff at unplugging myself from everything I’m hooked up to, while they remove the boots and pillows I can get everything else detached. Then I have to roll over and put the back part of my brace on, get centered on that and then attach the front plate, then tuck in all the cords so they don’t drag or end up being dipped into the pot. I then make it to the edge of the bed, sit for a few seconds/minutes and then I have to work on widening my stance so I can stand up while using a walker. This process is repeated every time I have to go to the bathroom, by the time I am done I am normally ready to go back to bed and get some rest. It takes lots of mental juggling to get it together, I do try to schedule a couple of hours of sitting up, but it is exhausting. This morning I am waiting for the OT guy to come in before I go back to bed, I hope it is soon, I don’t feel well.

I may get out by Friday at the earliest and I am ready to go home to my babies and my bed.

This I know IS the truth!

I know the months ahead will be difficult but this hasn’t killed me yet. I don’t know my own strength, but I guess I can kick ass….somewhat.

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