Control~ a could/would/should be essay that is or isn’t~

Control Being in control, taking control, losing control, having control, ceding control, and using control….. My battle with control has been a long one, one I will probably never completely give up no matter the detritus to me. My early memories of good, bad and ugly all fighting for a piece of me go way [...]

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Unsettled & unhinged ~

That’s how I spent my night…nothing to do but toss and turn and deal with a flood of emotions I wish would not intrude. I found myself reading instead of trying to sleep and as I turned the pages reading the words that gave the character her history I found that the words were touching me [...]

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Going nucking futs~

This lack of sleep business is just for the dogs…I am so mentally dead, I keep  thinking eventually I’ll read myself to sleep…but it hasn’t happened…instead I find myself breezing through hundreds of pages, book after book, when I get tired of reading a book, I put it down and move on to a magazine, [...]

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I’m going crazee~

It came in a wave…the heart pounding fear…out of nowhere…I hate fear. I have no use for it, much like the male species, it came and wreaked havoc, uninvited, unwanted….leaving me a breathless mess. Crazy.

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Antsy part 2~

So I am in bed, tossing, turning, wishing desperately for sleep, it ain’t happening. Took another pain pill…my third one I think, maybe forth, I only have  2 left. We have the AC blasting, radio on, lights on, laptop on…neither of us can sleep. I wish I was home, in my own bed, with my [...]

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Missing you could turn from pain to pleasure, if I knew you were missing me too~

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The Ex Files~ An Amalgamation~

Amalgamation is the process of combining or uniting entities into one form. …coming soon~

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It’s a long road back~

I was trying to sleep, didn’t happen…so I got out of bed and picked up a book, read about 250 pages and tried for sleep again, nope, didn’t happen. Again I rolled out of bed and picked up the book and finished the last 200 pages and thought to myself, “self, try again”. so I [...]

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Saturday morning ramblings~

They say time heals all wounds, but maybe it should be said that time wounds all heals. You may have been wounded and healed, then you take a new stab at something different and you end up wounding what was previously healed….follow me? Well like for example you scrape your knee but you don’t take [...]

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It’s a new day~

…but then every day is a new day. That there was a brilliant drug free observation. Behind me is my TV droning with the local news…nada much happens in San Angelo, so the cutaway is soon headed towards state and national news. Last year homicide was the biggest headline maker…that is a scary shift for [...]

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